Short Answers

By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman

QUARENTINE QUERY
Dear Short Answers:
Although phone or video sex has never interested me before, it seems like that is what the times demand. What do you think?
Lonely

Dear Lonely:
We feel you — and we are agnostic on this. Go with your gut — risks and rewards are probably about the same as always.

 

WEIGHTY ISSUES

Dear Short Answers:
I know how to be healthy and lose weight but I can’t stop sneak-binge eating. I lose weight and then I feel the pounds sneaking up on me when I’m alone and binge eat things like fat free cheese, tubs of hummus and bags of brown rice. They are all healthy items but I often fill my tummy with kale and fennel until it feels like it’s going to pop. Sometimes I steal my roommate’s almonds or chocolate and eat pounds at a time. How do I stop?
Too Full

Dear Too:
Stuffing yourself with kale is no better than chocolate and almonds. You are trying to self-soothe and it isn’t working. Figure out what’s REALLY bothering you and you won’t have a weight problem.

 

OLD-FASHIONED GIRL

Dear Short Answers:
My girlfriend makes more money than I do but she still wants me to pay for everything — drinks, dinner, moves, concerts. She says that if I ask her out — then I have to pay. I have tried to split the check — but she refuses. How can I get her to pay her share?
Poor Boy

Dear Boy:
Although this strikes us as a peculiarly archaic attitude, you probably can’t change it. Get a more lucrative job or a more modern girlfriend.

RUNAROUND DAD

Dear Short Answers:
My brother is having a baby (his first) in the fall and I think he’s really happy about it. But he still hangs out with his friends and I am pretty sure that he’s been screwing around with other women (at least he was before we all started to stay at home). I have asked him and he denies it. If his wife found out it would kill her. But if I tell her, it might make him stop. Do I tell his wife?
Stressed Sibling

Dear Stressed:
NO. You may not be right and it is none of your business anyway. If you are truly concerned — take your brother aside and tell him that the birth of his child is a fine opportunity to grow up — kids need two adult parents.

THE NATIONAL DRUG OF PREFERENCE

Dear Short Answers:
How much is too much when it comes to drinking alcohol?
Need Limits

Dear Limits:
When alcohol interferes with your life, it’s way too much. Unfortunately, most people can’t see it for themselves. If you think you have a problem, you probably do. If you drink more than those around you, it is probably too much. If your friends and family think you drink too much, you probably drink too much. It’s a drug — be careful. 

LET SLEEPING DOGS LIE

Dear Short Answers:
How do I know if my boyfriend is lying and cheating on me?
Sara

Dear Sara:
When you catch him., Until then, forget it.

Life is complicated.  Short Answers isn’t.

Send a question about whatever is bothering you to [email protected] or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer.  A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.

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