Short Answers

By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman

THE ACCULTURATION OF MATE PROSPECTS

Dear Short Answers:
My new boyfriend has a phobia about sharing his food with other people.  If I take a bite from his plate, he refuses to eat it anymore.  I grew up in a big family that loved to share.  Do you think that I will have to stop picking off his plate forever or is there a way to convince him that sharing is more fun?
I Like It My Way!

Dear My Way:
We’ve met both — the “my food is your food” types and the “mine is mine.”   Our experience is that these things are as immutable as blood type.  Stay away from his vittles.

HELP-LESS CASE

Dear Short Answers:
After 40 years of marriage, my husband still does absolutely nothing around the house unless I ask him. The other day, we went grocery shopping and when we got home, I struggled with 10 bags of groceries while my husband walked into the house empty-handed and turned on the TV set. I asked him to help so he went out and got 2 bags. I asked him again and he went out and got 2 more. How do I get him to help out without having to ask EVERY SINGLE TIME!!
Sick of It

Dear Sick:
Sounds like he’s willing but inert until activated. Ask him to do complete tasks — like “honey, will you bring in all the groceries while I put them away” or “honey will you clean the kitchen and mop the floor while I take a nap.”  Tell him he has been promoted from assistant to co-manager.

EGO NEEDS

Dear Short Answers:
My boss takes credit for everything I do at work. How do I make him stop and at least get credit for the things I do?
So Unfair

Dear Unfair:
On the most basic level, your job is to make your BOSS look good.  On the other hand, you could try telling him you would like a place in the lime light from time to time, but don’t forget that means you crash and burn on your own as well.  Truth is, talent outs.  We recommend getting your back rubbed at home.

THE MURKY LURKY

Dear Short Answers:
I recently started dating a really great guy – good-looking, great job, sense of humor – the whole package. The problem is that every time I see him, he surprises me with some “news” about his past. He will just casually mention his ex-wife or the time he got arrested for smoking pot or the girl he got pregnant when he was 16. I’m afraid there might be many more surprises. Do I just take one date at a time or can I get him to come clean NOW before we get too serious?
Nervous

Dear Nervous:
No one is obligated to unload all their baggage on the first date. On the other hand, you seem to feel that there is a deal breaker in the offing. Find your moment to ask.

‘TIS THE SEASON
Dear Short Answers:
When can I start listening to Holiday Music??
In the Spirit

Dear Spirit:
Now is fine with us.

Life is complicated.  “Short Answers” isn’t.

Send a question about whatever is bothering you to [email protected] or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer.  A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.

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