Short Answers

By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

Dear Short Answers:
My boyfriend and I have been together for less than a year and have a great relationship except for one thing. He can’t sleep unless the room is really cold and I can’t sleep unless it’s warm. I’ve tried flannel nightgowns but I hate them. He bought me a heavy comforter but I still like the room temp to be warm. We still have separate apartments so he doesn’t stay over at my place very often. Do you think this will be the reason we split up? It seems silly but we can’t really figure out a compromise that works.
Running Hot and Cold

Dear Hold and Cold:
What worries us is your problem solving abilities. If you can’t work this one out, long term prospects don’t look good.

BAD BEHAVIOR ON HIS PART, DOESN’T JUSTIFY YOURS

Dear Short Answers:
One night when my boyfriend was staying over at my place, I looked at his cell phone (which was beeping) and saw a whole stream of sexually explicit texts from a former (???) girlfriend. When I confronted him, he said it wasn’t his fault that she still texts him and that I shouldn’t be looking at his cell phone, anyway. The next time he stayed over, I checked his cell phone again and he had made it password-protected so I couldn’t see anything. I guessed at some logical passwords but nothing worked. Unfortunately, I tried too many times and it locked his cell phone and he had to go to the AT&T store to get it unlocked. He’s furious at me for checking his phone again. He says he needs his privacy but I think he’s hiding something. What do you think?
Girl Friend

Dear Girl Friend:
Stay away from his phone! If you think he is continuing a relationship with his ex then talk to him about it. If you feel he isn’t being honest with you, then who needs him?

EQUAL RIGHTS

Dear Short Answers:
There is a person at work who has basically the same job responsibilities that I have. The problem is that I am single and she is married with 3 young children. Every week, she always has a different, long, involved story about having to take her kids to the doctor, or drive her kids to ballet class or visit her kids at camp that prohibits her from working late or on the weekends. The boss is very sympathetic to her issues and lets her get away with it. Which means that I’m the one who gets stuck with all the extra work and I’m the one who has to be on call practically 24 hours a day. How do I convince my boss that this is simply not fair and even a working mom needs to share the load.
Single and Suffering

Dear S&S:
Simply state the problem to your boss: Providing backup for your co-worker’s childcare responsibilities is not part of your job description. Late hours and weekend work need to be shared. If he is not responsive, then you need to be less available or ask for additional compensation.

A VERY PERSONAL QUESTION

Dear Short Answers:
How much drinking is too much?
Party Girl

Dear PG:
If you think you drink too much, you probably do. If others think so, they are probably right.

Life is complicated. “Short Answers” isn’t.

Send a question about whatever is bothering you to [email protected] or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer. A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.

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