Short Answers

By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman


Dear Short Answers:
About 6 months ago I broke up with my boyfriend because he turned out to be a liar, a cheat, with more than a few bad habits.  I caught him stealing money from me and found evidence that he was sleeping with other women.  I think I have an obligation to tell his new girlfriends what he’s like.  How much detail do you think I should provide?
Prosecution Witness

Dear PW:
Nothing is appreciated less than unsolicited advice. It’s called gossip. However if your opinion is requested — let it rip.


Dear Short Answers:
My boyfriend and I just graduated from high school and planned to go to different colleges. We had agreed that we would date other people but now that college is online, we are both living at home and I think we should go back to being exclusive but my BF things a deal is still a deal. Do you think he is being fair?
Help Me

Dear Help:
It really isn’t about fair — its about hearing what is being said.


Dear Short Answers:
A new family just moved in next door and they have two pit bulls. We have two Boston terriers. There is a fence between our yards but the problem is whenever all four dogs are outside, the pit bulls bark ferociously and claw violently at the fence. Then our dogs start barking, making quite a ruckus. It gets so bad that I can’t let our dogs out whenever the pit bulls are outside (which is ALL the time). I asked the new neighbors to do something about their dogs but they just laughed at me. I also suggested that we take turns letting our dogs out but they refuse to cooperate. Do you have any suggestions?
Looking for a Doggish Solution

Dear Doggish:
We have been both victimized and in love with pit bulls — we understand. Dogs take their signals from their owners. A non-hostile agreement among all of you is the best of all possible worlds but requires that everyone work with their own dogs. You hold the trump card. Most towns have barking dog ordinances and, fair or not, most people would presume that the pit is the perp.


Dear Short Answers:
I have three kids who are going back to college this year, a freshman, sophomore and senior. I am petrified that at least one will get COVID. Not only could they get sick but they could bring it back home. I want to put my foot down and tell them not to go but I think they will hate me forever if I do. What should I do????
Worried Mama

Dear Mama:
Do what you can to plan ahead and if one of them gets sick, you will deal with it when it occurs. Until then, be proud of three in college!


Dear Short Answers:
I’m 78 years old and I think I look great for my age. Actually, I look fabulous. And, believe me, it wasn’t just genes or luck. I work at it! What irks me is when people say, “You look great. How old are you?” All this does is remind me that I’m old. Do you have a good response for this rude question?
Young at Heart

Dear Young:
37 is always a good answer. Or 93, depending on how you want to play it.

Life is complicated.  Short Answers isn’t. 

Send a question about whatever is bothering you to or go to and a psychologist and sociologist will answer.  A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.

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