Short Answers – DON’T GET US STARTED

By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman

 

Dear Short Answers:
I kept putting off buying Christmas presents until finally it was too late and I didn’t actually buy any gifts for anyone this year. Now I’m feeling guilty. Should I buy presents when everything goes on sale and tell people that is why I procrastinated? Or do I just ignore the whole holiday and try to do better next year?
Late Shopper

Dear LS:
We think there are many wonderful moments in the ritual of thoughtful planning, joyful giving and graceful acceptance of gifts. However, so much of that has been lost, one can hardly blame you for your ambivalence during the holiday season. Why not take the opportunity, throughout the year, to appreciate friends and family with presents or other expressions of affection, as the spirit moves you. Spare yourself and others any defensive explanation.

 

DEFINITELY WORTH A TRY

Dear Short Answers:
My wife and I have had a miserable marriage since the beginning. In all honesty, the only reason we’ve stayed together at all is because of the sex (which is great). We were seriously talking about divorce but then she just found out that she was pregnant. Would it be wrong to get a divorce before the baby is born? Or do you think we should stay together in case the baby changes our marriage? Maybe if we focus on a child instead of our problems, things will get better.
Filled with Doubts

Dear Doubts:
A baby to save a marriage is hardly an unique idea, albeit a generally unsuccessful one. How about some marriage counseling BEFORE the baby is born? A good therapist and some good honest work on your relationship NOW is the very least you owe your child. A parenting course wouldn’t hurt either.

 

THIS IS WHAT EBAY IS FOR

Dear Short Answers:
When my husband found out that regular light bulbs are no longer going to be sold in stores, he bought hundreds of them (and I literally mean HUNDREDS) and is planning to sell them to friends in order to make a huge profit. He hasn’t started to do this yet but I am already humiliated beyond belief. How do I convince him that this is a really stupid, really embarrassing idea?
Horrified

Dear H:
We agree, very embarrassing. Tell him to get it done with one online transaction.

 

WITHOUT FURTHER INFORMATION

Dear Short Answers:
My husband and I were invited to a cocktail and dessert party last week that began at 9 p.m. It seemed rather late to us but we decided to go anyway. When we arrived at 9:01, we were greeted by 12 people sitting around a dinner table finishing their meal. Apparently, the “in group” was invited to dinner and the riff-raff were invited just for dessert. Doesn’t that seem a bit rude to you?
Miffed

Dear M:
Perhaps there is more information — was it a two-tiered benefit? But as you tell it, we are quite offended. Class A and Class B invites these days seem very strange.

 

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN FANTASY AND EVERYTHING ELSE

Dear Short Answers:
Are New Year’s resolutions really worth making?????

Dear ????:
Resolutions are bound to be depressingly disappointing unless they are accompanied by a daily plan. What are you prepared to do every day to help you reach your goal? If you can’t commit to a very specific, measurable daily plan, then resolutions are rarely meaningful.

 

Life is complicated.  “Short Answers” isn’t.

 

Send a question about whatever is bothering you to KonkLife@shortanswers.net or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer.  A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.

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