Short Answers
By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman
MISTAKEN IDENTITY
Dear Short Answers:
There’s this girl that really likes me and I like her too. But not in the same way. I think it’s because I’m gay but not really sure. I want to tell her to stop trying to have sex with me and that it’s not her fault. But I don’t know how to tell her I’m gay because I’m not really ready and not really sure. What do I do? I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
On the Fence
Dear Fence:
This happens more often than you think and may be the best legitimate use of the “can’t we just be friends” line. You don’t owe her full disclosure — and we suspect she’ll live.
THY NEIGHBOR’S POOP
Dear Short Answers:
My neighbor (not a good friend) and I were out walking our dogs. My neighbor’s dog pooped in somebody else’s yard and the woman came out and started to yell at us. If it was my dog, I would have apologized and cleaned it up. But my neighbor started to argue back and they got into a screaming match. I didn’t want to get involved so I just walked away. I couldn’t defend my neighbor because I think she was wrong. Now she’s furious at me. Should I have stuck around and argued? I just didn’t think it was worth it. Who was right?
A Pooper Scooper
Dear Pooper:
In our view it is never okay not to pick up after your dog . What’s to argue about?
SAY WHAT?
Dear Short Answers:
My husband just turned 60. He’s fortunate to be in good health, but I swear his hearing is not what it used to be. I’m tired of repeating things with a raised voice. He says I mumble and that no one at work complains they have to repeat conversations. Suggestions?
SCREAMING
Dear Scream:
It is tiresome to keep repeating things and it is also hard to admit to an impairment. How about a hearing test? Facts are often helpful.
TOO MUCH INFORMATION
Dear Short Answers,
I’m working in the U.S. on a temporary work visa that lasts for another two years. When I meet a girl, do I need to tell her this? Or should I wait until something gets serious. I don’t want to seem dishonest. But I also don’t want to assume that she cares on the first date. When is the right time?
Just Visiting
Dear JV:
Two years is a very long time during which anything can happen. Take each relationship as it comes and if the conversation and/or the relationship takes a turn toward the future, one should always be honest.
SMOTHER LOVE
Dear Short Answers:
If your boyfriend always wants to be with you — is that a bad thing?
Too Close?
Dear Too:
It’s a bad thing if you feel you don’t have the freedom to do things you want to do — either alone, or with other friends. Tell him you really care, but a little absence would make your heart grow fonder.
WHAT WE KNOW
Dear Short Answers:
How does the human heart work?
Befuddled
Dear B:
The bass is steady; the melody is unpredictable.
Life is complicated. Short Answers isn’t.
Send a question about whatever is bothering you to [email protected] or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer. A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.
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