Short Answers

By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman 

FAMILY AFFAIR

Dear Short Answers:
My wife and I are both in our late 60s and are both recently retired. We have kids and grandkids in the area and are thrilled to be able to spend more time with them and love being a frequent babysitter. But that’s not the problem. Although my parents passed away, my wife’s parents are still living and in their 90s. As they have become more frail, my wife has decided that we should move in with them so that they can stay in their home instead of moving to an assisted living facility. The problem is that they live over 1000 miles away in a town that I have barely even visited. I am extremely happy with the ways things are now and I don’t understand why we should ruin it. Am I being completely insensitive? I’m petrified that my in-laws will live to 100 and my grand-kids will be teen-agers by the time I get back.
Grandad
Dear Grandad:
We hear you. And your wife should too. Even if you both were “all in” on the idea of the move, it would be challenging. We think you need to clearly tell her that this is NOT what you want and discuss with her the many alternatives to her plan

THE FAIR FARE

Dear Short Answers:
I had my friend “watch” my car while I was on vacation and he didn’t move it for opposite side of the street parking. Should he pay for it or should I since he was doing me a favor?
Trying to be Fair

Dear Fair:
Of course you need to pay the tickets — and of course you need to find a new car watcher.

GROWING GROWN-UPS

Dear Short Answers:
I’m a single mom with a teen age daughter. I work in a bank so I have to get up every day by 7AM. The problem is that my daughter takes 2 hours to get ready for school so I have to get up at 5:30 just to start the whole process. I wake her up. She stays in bed for another half hour. I wake her up again and have to nearly drag her out of bed. This happens every day. I tried just letting her get up on her own but that didn’t work. She slept through the alarm clock and missed school. She’s 15 years old. What do I do?
Too Tired

Dear Too:
This is typical adolescent behavior — but that doesn’t mean it should be ignored. These are the years in which parents need to help their kids understand what it means to be an adult. At 15, getting up and preparing for school should be her responsibility. Tell her to develop a “morning strategy” and that you want to hear it.  

TWICE BLESSED

Dear Short Answers:
How do I choose between two eligible bachelors?

Dear Twice:
If neither your heart nor your head is giving you a signal, then maybe they aren’t so eligible.  Provide more data or “ask your mother.”

Life is complicated.  Short Answers isn’t. 

Send a question about whatever is bothering you to [email protected] or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer.  A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.

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