Short Answers

By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman

 

EVERY TOWN IS A SMALL TOWN

Dear Short Answers: We just purchased a house for $545,000. The listing agent was also the selling agent. It was a cash deal, so she made a good deal of money for very limited input. She gave us a very nice pewter tray, which I like, but upon opening the box, stuck in a corner under the packaging was a Christmas card from another person, thanking her for her continued support. I want to send her a nice thank-you note to tell her how much we liked the tray. I would also like to send the card we found back to her and just say “oops.” What do you think? Signed, Can’t Wait

Dear Can’t Wait: Don’t do it. You never know…

 

NOT ABOUT YOU … ENTIRELY

Dear Short Answers: Don’t you think it’s important that older people learn how to use the Internet? My parents refuse to text or email and they still have an old-fashioned answering machine which they often forget to check. When I need to find them, I have to keep calling until they pick up the phone. I bought then a computer but they refuse to use it. How do I get them to enter the 21st century? Their Son

Dear Son: They are probably unwilling — perhaps unable to change. The old-fashioned ways of communicating — calling and calling and then calling a neighbor — might not be so bad after all. Haven’t you ever wished to be less accessible?

 

 

AN AMATEUR’S GAME

Dear Short Answers: My new daughter-in-law is a doll and, I thought, a responsible person. She recently accepted my offer to use my classic sports car, along with specific instructions on dealing with its idiosyncratic nature when driving. Everything and everyone is fine, but an unfortunate and expensive incident resulted from her admitted inattention. I don’t want this important relationship to go off the rails, but I’m not sure I can trust her again in the same manner. Should I accept her apology and move on? Ask her to pay for the damage? I’m hesitant to bring my son into the picture. Signed, Carless in California

Dear C in C: Let it go. These in-law relationships are complicated from everyone’s standpoint. She doesn’t know if you expect her to act like your kid (sheepish apology) or a fellow adult (man-up and pay). If you like her, consider yourself fortunate, and know you will work things out over time. The problem isn’t trust — it’s inexperience. And you are right, don’t involve your son.

 

MAY I HELP YOU?

Dear Short Answers: My neighbor is elderly and becoming frail. We are friends and I would like to help her with her garden this year. How do I offer without offending her? Younger in Springtime

Dear Younger: Keep it light. No need for lengthy explanations. Drop by on a nice day and say “put me to work.”

 

TIDINGS OF COMFORT AND JOY — NO QUESTIONS ASKED

Dear Short Answers: Is it wrong to celebrate Christmas if you don’t believe in god? Charles

Dear Charles: We never think it’s a bad idea to celebrate ANYTHING!

 

Life is complicated. “Short Answers” isn’t.

 

Send a question about whatever is bothering you to [email protected] or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer. A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.

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