Short Answers
By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman
ABOVE OUR PAY GRADE
Dear Short Answers: I live in a small town close to a major city and was having a hard time finding a really good reliable cleaning woman. So I advertised in the local newspaper. In the ad, I specified that this person MUST speak English. You wouldn’t believe the nasty comments I received. Since I’m the person doing the hiring, isn’t it my right to specify that they speak whatever language I want them to? MAD!
Dear MAD!: Although we are not lawyers, we believe that it is illegal to require that an employee speaks English unless the job cannot be performed by a non-English speaker. In other words, we think you are on shaky grounds legally. And politically.
NEVER ASSUME
Dear Short Answers: I am 26 years old, very tall and thin and very blond and everybody thinks I am gay — but I’m not. Girls at work try to set me up with other guys and even my mother has arranged blind dates with gay sons of her friends. How do I tell them to stop it — or do you think they might be right and I just don’t know it yet? Tom
Dear Tom: Tell them to stop setting you up. Gay or straight — you will find your way when you’re ready.
IT’S A TOUGHIE
Dear Short Answers: Is it OK for my ex-husband to expose our daughter to his two girlfriends? Mom
Dear Mom: We hate to answer questions with questions but this time it all depends: 1) How old are your daughters? 2) Do you trust your ex to introduce these women in a way that will be comfortable for your girls? 3) Can you do anything about it anyway?
INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR
Dear Short Answers: One of my employees is constantly sharing her personal problems at work. Sometimes it’s about her kid or her parents or her health. But there is always an issue. No one has said anything to me but people are starting to avoid her and that is affecting the office. How do I tell her that we all like her very much and feel sorry that she probably doesn’t have any friends or family to share this with, but that this is still work and she needs to keep these things to herself? The Boss
Dear Boss: If she is confiding in you, tell her you don’t have time for it. Let the others handle it themselves.
WARRANTY EXPIRED?
Dear Short Answers: How old should my children be before I allow them to get a tattoo? Jilly
Dear Jilly: Our general rule is that at 18, when kids can vote or go to war, they then assume responsibility for their own bodies. However, if you are tattooed — it might be another story.
LUCK OF THE DRAW
Dear Short Answers: Do you think that most of those photos people post on Facebook of their darling children and expensive vacations and fantastic meals are real? Having an Issue
Dear Issue: YES, we think their lives are better than yours. Or maybe their photographs are more professional and better edited.
Life is complicated. “Short Answers” isn’t.
Send a question about whatever is bothering you to [email protected] or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer. A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.
[livemarket market_name="KONK Life LiveMarket" limit=3 category=“” show_signup=0 show_more=0]
I think your answer concerning the person who insisted that the cleaning person they hire speak English was totally wrong. If I am hiring someone who is going to be cleaning my dwelling, and I only speak English, how am I supposed to communicate with the person who I hire to do the cleaning if they can’t speak English? Forget the politically correct stuff, it is solely a question of being able to direct and monitor the person doing the cleaning. Would sign language be adequate? Would I have to jump back and forth from an English to whatever dictionary? And as far as private employment goes, it’s not like this person is a governmental entity, so I don’t see where there are any restrictions on their ability to determine job requirements, regardless of how other people may feel about it. These other people are not opening their dwelling up to a complete stranger and trusting that person to not only clean the place, but respect the owners possessions, private momentos, and financial information!