Short Answers

By Jeff Johnson and Paula Forman

 HOSTING 101

Dear Short Answers: If you are having a party and you know for certain that one of the guests is going to bring a person that everyone HATES, is it appropriate to ask that guest in advance to bring someone else?  Or does an invitation to a party allow a guest to bring whoever they want? TT

Dear TT: Yes, an invitation means that you gracefully receive what comes your way.

 

DON’T WASTE YOUR PRECIOUS TIME

Dear Short Answers: At what point in the relationship is it OK to start talking about kids and if you want them or not? On My Mind

Dear OMM: If it’s a deal breaker for you (either “yes, you do,” or “no, you don’t”), then the sooner the better.

 

MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING

Dear Short Answers: I’ve been a friend of Mary Claire’s for five years now.  Her daughter is getting married and does not want any of her former coaches, doctors or teachers present (my husband is one of them).  Mary Claire asked if I can attend as the guest of another friend (female) of ours who was invited alone.  She said she hopes my husband will understand, acknowledging that this is indeed awkward, yet making it clear that it is her daughter’s wedding and naturally, the bride rules.  Another friend suggested that Mary Claire’s daughter is being highly immature, and that I should not feel pressured to attend under these circumstances.  I have been leaning toward not attending, however, my husband, a very sound person and not hurt by any of this, knows how immature the daughter is and feels I may disappoint Mary Claire if I do not attend the wedding as our friend’s guest.  While I understand Mary Claire’s good intentions, I am evaluating my comfort level in addressing innocent inquiries at the wedding as to why my husband is not present.  Way too much to think about here, and I’m not even the bride!  LOL!  So, my ask is this:  Go or not go and why? Betty

Dear Betty: Go to the wedding. If people ask where your husband is, say he wasn’t invited. Simple.

 

THIS ISN’T A CASTING CALL

Dear Short Answers: What do I do if my ex of over a year and a half says he wants us to be friends so maybe we can work back into things, but he’s also talking to other girls? Dumped Once

Dear D.O.: He has already handled the merchandise. No returns. No exceptions.

 

LOCO PARENTIS

Dear Short Answers: My next door neighbor went out of town for five days and left her 19-year old son at home. She doesn’t want him to have any parties, etc. and asked my husband and me to keep a look out, which I frankly don’t feel comfortable about. The first night mom’s away, the kids are sneaking into the pool at night; second night cars are lining the block. What do I do? Neighbor

Dear N: Since you accepted the role, call the kid and tell him to cut it out or you will call his mom.

 

IMMUTABLE LAW OF NATURE

Dear Short Answers: I caught my friend cheating on his girlfriend, should I tell her? Pete

Dear Pete: No, she will find out in time. Everyone does.

 

Life is complicated. “Short Answers” isn’t.

 

Send a question about whatever is bothering you to [email protected] or go to www.shortanswers.net and a psychologist and sociologist will answer. A selection of the best questions will be printed every week in KonkLife.

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